Consequent to the latest round of Sino Indian LAC standoff, I am contemplating changing my profile, I can no longer be a “Confused Confucious”, that is obviously anti-national, I could be a Confused Chanakya or Cunning Chanakya, or may be even Keen Kautilya even at the cost of being labelled as a “Keen kumar”, a title reserved for the jumping jacks in their professional lives, who are the initiative types, the guys who suck up to the bosses(!) But Confucious oh No; God save me from the wrath of the troll army, who have earned notoriety of an exceptionally high order in such a short time frame, you see, short time again, with such short fuses too, they can take an offence to anything at all. No one is safe from the wrath of the Troll brigades which are unleashed on the PM, RaGa to Big B and just about anybody else. The other day the Big B himself was at the receiving end with his set of questions in the KBC.
Confused Confucious at least added to the confusion, with Chanakya it could be chants, as Chanakya could never ever be confused(!), but unfortunately Ashwin Sanghi has already usurped that title for his novel Chanakya’s Chant. That would be blatant plagiarism, moreover state of confusion is bliss and I wouldn’t like to clear it either. We honed the skill of “doping” in NDA (nothing political about this NDA, I am referring to the original National Defence Academy Khadakwasla). No not the narco variety of doping, else the NCB would be on my heels before I can finish this “dope act” of mine, nor the sportsmen type usage of performance enhancing drugs, nor does it have anything to do with the Chemical bonding by doping as done in the silicon chips. Doping when used as a slang, it could mean a “fool”. The dope acts in our second term in NDA were a deliberate put on act to fool the seniors into believing that we had goofed up owing to our ignorance, in the most innocent ‘bechara’ type facial expression. More often than not, it worked, we did get away with murder literally.
The trouble with these Chinese are that they have a long term vision and they have no concern for the short term whatsoever, whereas we have traditionally been myopic, surviving from one day to the next, “living in the moment”, already in a state of Nirvana since times immemorial. Naturally we are at a loss as to why are these guys afflicted with this “Long term” malaise, why can’t everyone be like us, you see the Pakis, they only think of today and may be dream of the morrow when they have their rendezvous with the 72 virgins but nothing beyond that. In any case all these grandiose plans actually come to a nought. See all those Five year plans, where have they landed us. Had the Planning Commission been scrapped ab initio do you think we would have been any worse, so why this charade….. as it is we have been blundering along from one crisis to another. But with the Chinese, we have really developed it into an art form, whether it was the ‘Annexation of Tibet’ or the ‘permanent seat in Security Council’, “Hindi Chini bhai bhai” leading to the 62 debacle to the ‘Wuhan spirit’ ending up without any fizz in Doklam – Galwan. It is obvious we don’t have a clue ……
Anyway getting back to the ‘Long and Short’ of this vision business, my hunch is that it has something to do with their short physical stature, being rather short in height they make up for it by strategising over the long term or may be it is their eyes being small , which empower them with this unique quality. Not that we are Goliaths by any standards, but compared to our Northern neighbours, we are definitely endowed with a couple of inches more in the vertical domain. Confucious has to be jettisoned for sure. Any suggestions…..
Original Comments:
Sachu (2020-12-01):
You have a point Sufuciius however why should be define ourselves with a great person he was….we have learnt and followed his teachings for long..
Humanity is a religion and who knowa it more than you..
My two bit.. excellent write as usual my dear…enjoy your jottings
Sheraz Varma (2020-12-01):
Brilliantly surmised the strength of our adversary. I guess we at the NDA did our dope act 1, scene 1,2 & 3 for perhaps a term… Our political masters are dope act perpetual. You do take us back to those good old days of yore
Yo (2020-12-01):
Witty and profound
Patanjali Puri (2020-12-01):
Fun read, as always…
Col Jitendra Singh (2020-12-01):
Very well written with good humour. U have mastered this art of good blog writing. Keep it up.
Akshaya Handa (2020-12-01):
Cophuzed Genghis or Kabulai will be loved by all the trolls. The former maybe better as the latter on the one hand maybe mistaken for Kabuli Chana by some while the Chinese may claim you as their own on the other. Hmmmmmm. Latter is also an interesting proposition……
Surbhi (2020-12-01):
Compliments for amazing insight and sweeping presentation of thoughts…
Amusing piece!!
Raj Jagga (2020-12-01):
Outstanding..what subtle humor and yet covers all important happenings…compliments…Confucious.
Or..chanakya..
raju (2020-12-01):
Short height …therefore long vision …humour at its best. Chinese would do better if they follow teachings of Mr Confucius and not MrXi. Nice one as usual.
arun sharma (2020-12-01):
Nice read. I agree, we live for the day. Maybe we lack the tunnel vision of the Chinese to look at the future in their self serving manner but we have a joie de vivre and sense of humour, as epitomised by you that they must surely envy.
Munendra Gupta (2020-12-01):
While the Chinese are dug in for a long haul and not blinking, I am still trying to make sense of nonsense. Surely NDA days were better doping and getting away with anything short of murder!! You Sir have astoundingly mastered the art of transporting your exclusive club of readers into nostalgic reminiscences, sprinkled generously with a dash of lemon. Looking forward to more gems……
Pankaj (2020-12-01):
Another good one … happy to note the increase in frequency … keep writing …
Anjan (2020-12-01):
Splitting people with slit eyed humour I see
Glad Gladiator (2020-12-01):
Amazing insights!!
KPM Das (2020-12-01):
Amusing way to connect dots and come around a full circle. Utter confusion!! Great read….
Sofie (2020-12-02):
Nice!…how about donning a second hat or choti for that matter on a regular basis?
Unknown (2020-12-02):
Interesting as usual, but what of the Chinese virus……ha ha
Vinod Shanker (2020-12-02):
Very well enunciated thoughts, sprinkled with pun and humour, keep the Confucius going
Suresh Yadav (2020-12-02):
Fun reading and interesting article as usual . I sense this time our eastern neighbour is in for tough times ahead courtesy WUHAN.
Sandeep Malik (2020-12-02):
Super read, as usual, Suyash. Can't wait for the next.
Sunil V Damle (2020-12-02):
Enjoyed reading it as always, Suyash.
JayBee (2020-12-02):
Good analysis. Keep going.
Cyrus Minwalla (2020-12-02):
Super article, Suyash
Unknown (2020-12-03):
Great awesome.very interesting and a treat to read
harikuk (2020-12-03):
Great Read
Unknown (2020-12-03):
Nice read
Anonymous (2020-12-03):
Always great reading your blog. Giving a message with humour all along is an art and you do it beautifully. Keep them coming Suyash. Deepak Dhanda
Anonymous (2020-12-03):
Always great reading your blog. Giving a message with humour all along is an art and you do it beautifully. Keep them coming Suyash. Deepak Dhanda
VM (2020-12-03):
A perfect read sir…
With confused confuscius and chanting chankya already out, you could well consider transcending from loitering Lao Tzu to Suyash Shankar (of Adi Shankaracharya fame)…
Happy jotting!!
Bisht (2020-12-03):
Good write up Suyash.Very humourous.Keep treating us with your innovative anecdotes.
Madhavi V Mhatre (2020-12-04):
Good read